Article & Photography by Mr. Pam

When I was about 6 years old, my dad bought our first camera. Back in the 1980’s, before smartphones and digital cameras, it was all film. For the younger kinksters out there, you literally had to go to the store, buy a roll of film with 24 photos, carefully put the film inside the camera without ‘exposing it’ (any light hitting the film would destroy your photos), then bring the finished roll to a film developing store, wait about a week and then you’d see your photographs. (If your photos are ‘naughty’, we had to find someone who wouldn’t mind developing them.) Plus you never really knew if a photograph turned out until you had a copy in your hand. It’s so archaic to imagine these days with my iPhone and my 177,937 image album, wild!

Photography back in the 80’s could get really expensive, to buy and develop multiple rolls of film. Fortunately, my Dad owned his own wine company and he used to trade cases of wine with his best friend who worked at Kodak. We had unlimited film and developing, for free! I became hooked on photography.

When I was 10 years old, I used to dress up my 2-year-old sister and create elaborate photoshoots. It’s fascinating to look back at those photos now; they were so detailed (for being 10 years old). They included styling, backdrops (which was usually my parents bed sheet), hair and make-up. My adolescent art direction looks ranged from Madonna to beach bunny, bike mechanic to ballerina.

Now, a decades later, I still have that same passion for photographing people. I always say that, ”when I have a camera in my hand, nothing else matters.”

For the past 20 years, I have enjoyed an adventurous career as a professional pornographer with multiple awards ranging from videography, directing, script writing and most recently, lifetime achievement award. Directing high-end porn is awesome, but it can often be stressful, location time-restraints and hard-ons not always in alignment. I’m happy I get to continue working in my true passion, which has always been photography.

Most of my porn career has been in gay porn, hence my nickname “Gay Porn Mama” but recently I dipped my toe into femme-domme, trans-girl BDSM porn. I’m proud to say, I love my trans-girls as much as my gay boys! Working with these diverse ladies has been so much fun.

Many of the models I have photographed were actually fans of my gay male porn from when they were just baby gays. The fan-girl feeling was mutual as I had seen many adult film actresses online and at different porn awards, so I was just as honored to photograph them.

Having spent most of my adult life in San Francisco, BDSM became a part of everyday life. Going to brunch and sitting next to a group of leather Daddies with their pups at their feet was normal. Folsom Street Fair is like Christmas, the happiest (and gayest) time of year. It was only natural that my love for photography and curiosity with BDSM would merge in my professional life as well.

Filming and directing a BDSM porn scene is one thing, but having the entire power exchange between two people captured into a single frame is incredible. Through my camera lens, I can capture the intricate dance between vulnerability and strength, the exchange of power captured into a single moment. My photos are not only erotic but also a celebration of gay men and trans women which has been an inspiration for my entire career. My photography is not just porn, it’s political: documenting and celebrating LGBTQ+ life, connections, struggles, accomplishments, and most of all—fun!

Big hugs & loads of love…
Mr. Pam

This article was originally published in the fourth issue of PROUD & Kinky Magazine. You may read it in its original format here.

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